2008년 02월 28일
update
Hi you guys!
Here's an update on how I'm doing
I have a sleeping disorder and i wanna kill myself
how are you?
# by | 2008/02/28 02:57 | sirace의 그림과 글 | 트랙백 | 덧글(9)
이 글의 문맥을 분석하여 이글루스에 있는 많은 글 중에서 관련성이 높은 글을 자동으로 검색해 낸 결과입니다.
☞ 내 이글루에 이 글과 관련된 글 쓰기 (트랙백 보내기) [도움말]
.mix warm milk with honey and drink it in one gulp.
.don't sleep for 48~72 hrs and then hit the bed.
.drink until you pass out (well of course something with fair volume of alchohol).
and for your wanting to suicide,
a book that I'm reading tells me that the desire comes from feeling like you're stuck in something (whether bad or just plain boring), and that it won't change; thus, it's not something that involves acute, dire pain but a stagnancy that seems to be the one and the only way that'll continue forever, and so in order to give it an ending, a change, people feel the desire to suicide when they're serious about it.
Assuming that this is the premise, I say that you try giving it a change while you're still alive. Too many rumors about afterlife, one of them including being stuck in your grave with all your conscious still pumping until 'due time comes,' and that sounds goddamn too boring, more boring than living in this everyday-the-same-and-painful routine hellhole.
if you need any ideas for possible changes, have a strong heart ready to be disappointed and ask me (and others. who knows). most will probably give you lameass answers like "drink warm milk" etc., but you might fall asleep like a baby after that one glass.
i guess i could try that milk remedy but the thing is i just hate milk so i'm just gonna pass that.
i know there is something seriously wrong with me and yes i do have that feeling of being stuck.
i need to change and i am trying really hard to make some changes.
but it's not easy to make changes when you are running a business and experiencing financial crisis.
i know better than to commit suicide but can't help feeling depressed..
i try to lighten up and put on a happy face and all that but i always go back to my depressed self..
sometimes i prey to god
but god is so painfully quiet.
But as you might have already guessed, and from what I've seen so far, this solution is about 'how not to suicide when you are super hot redneck female and 24 with stable job just because things are boring': not really for stressed and depressed men and women in korea who must strive a hell lot just to have some room to move around and think, drink, and stuff.
So damn easier being said than done, but what I can suggest with what little I know is that you need to find the source of your depression and get rid of it. Or if you can't get rid of it because you either can't identify the source or have an obligation not to destroy it, then deal with it. 'How??' is the next question, and that just differs so much on each case and each person, and I guess that's why shrinks can make a living out of it.
But!! nevertheless to take a stab at it - take it or leave it, 'tis up to your discretion!
how (to deal with it): don't put on a happy face by force, and try focusing your concentration and energy in expressing the stress and depression you feel. I don't even think it has to be overt to others but somehow, anyhow, try to articulate it whether through writing, drawing, or something else (like dancing, swimming, singing, I dunno). I think not having to have to fake what you are going through itself helps a lot to alleviate the stress. And if you can even deliver it to others, then even better, yeah?
try lavender tea with 1~2 spoons of honey! mother nature's sleeping syrup :D
I'll definately try it thanx.
I've read veronica decides to die. it was pretty interesting although i didn't manage to finish the book (got bored) i certainly have some of her symptoms. maybe i should try going to mental hospital. The place seemed peaceful and full of interesting people in the book.
I don't think you need to worry about me because whatever i'm experiencing will pass.
i just like whining about it that's all.
by the way are you coming back to korea?
glad you'll try :D
흐흐 perhaps you could even try the 신세계 병원 from 사이보그이지만 괜차나. that place seemed pretty interesting as well.
anyhoo, I'm back in Korea and in seoul. my second day here and I already feel like there's nothing new under the halogen light. 뷁
I love ur blog,, I think it need more updating???
don't cha?